I’ve heard women of all shapes and sizes make negative comments about their bodies, and fear the outcome of intimate pictures because of these beliefs. Women have stated that they feel too big, or too small, or that they don’t like their stomach, or that they don’t feel graceful. Fear around the body has little to do with the scale or the mirror, and everything to do with our minds and perceptions of self.
You’re not alone. I’ll start by stating that.
I have been 92lbs and 200lbs, and now I sit somewhere in between. No matter my size or strength, the mindset remained the same. I never felt like I was good enough. At my thinnest, I didn’t see a small body in the mirror. I didn’t see what everyone else saw. At my largest, just after giving birth, I didn’t give myself a break or celebrate all that my body had been through. Instead, I cried when I couldn’t put on my normal shoes and when none of my clothes fit.
In both cases, I was not nourishing my body well. My body had changed, but my mindset did not. This negative self perception filtered into every aspect of my life. From relationships, to what I ate, even in my business. It wasn’t until I started to value myself that I started on the journey of self love.
The moment you understand your value, everything begins to change.
Once I understood that I was worth something, my whole life started to shift. I was suddenly surrounded by people who valued me for who I was, and in a relationship that was deep and loving. My business started to lift off, too!
I’m not saying I’m perfect at this whole self-love thing. I have bad days still where I practice bringing myself back to the light and love. But what I will say is I’m much better off than even one year ago, and it all started with knowing I have something to offer this world. We all do.
MY ADVICE – What’s worked for me
First and foremost, if you’re experiencing some less-than-loving thoughts towards your body, I highly recommend throwing away your scale. Yes, just get rid of it. It doesn’t weigh your worth, it only measures gravity’s pull on your body.
Next, I challenge you to focus on 3 things you love about yourself, every day. These things may change on a daily basis, or remain the same until your list grows. They can be physical features or talents. Whatever it is, really focus on it. When you hear that negative self talk, bring yourself back with these 3 things.
My 3 things: My eyes, my style, my creativity
“ugh, I can’t believe my stomach is-”
*catch yourself. pause. reflect. change your language*
“I’m going to put on that peplum shirt, because I know it shows my personal style, which I love!” (and because I know it looks good, I’m not going to go back to the mirror)
Learning to really know your worth and change your language takes time and practice. My hope is that sharing some of my story can help other women on their journey to self love, too.
PS: If you’d like to join a community of women who are working towards self love and empowerment, CLICK HERE to join my Facebook group!